I Cant See It Coming Down My Eyes…

Tonight, I have realize something about myself. Something that may be a huge flaw in my personality. This thing could cause huge problems in future relationships. I have realized that I have ADD or ADHD. Yeah, folks I have an attention disorder. Okay, okay so I haven’t been officially ‘diagnosed’ with the disorder. But I know I have it!
Tonight I was on the phone with a friend that I talk to rather othen. Firstly, I’m not real big on talking on the phone. Especially after 9PM, talking on the phone with me is terrible. Right now we are in the midst of basketball season. Like tonight, some great games are on during primetime. But that’s besides the point. Unless we are having a real real indepth conversation, my attention will begin to wonder off into space. I have a pretty old soul. I will get sleepy on you in the blink of an eye. And I absolutely HATE just sitting there holding the phone. I know I angered this friend. She was trying to communicate something that was important to her. But with my shitty attention span, I zoned out and pretty much missed everything she was saying. And to her I truly do apologize.
Communication is a very big, important factor in ANY relationship. How can I communicate with an individual when my attention is about as long as a New York minute? Don’t get me wrong, I do know how to communicate with other individuals. But I would either have to really really focus or just the conversation has to be really interesting!
This is partially why I’m not in a relationship now. I have met some great girls over the last few years. I’ve clicked with most right off the back and others have grown on me. But none that have captured my attention to the point where I think ‘yeah, I want to be with you, like right now.’
I fear that one day I will look up and have missed out on possibly ‘the one’ because my attention/interest level is so shifty. I will have no one else to blame but myself. So when it does happen, I can’t cry or complain about it. Just gotta deal with it. IT IS WHAT IT IS. I Can’t See It Coming Down My Eyes, so I gotta make this blog cry.